From trials and tribulations Sirius Pup Pack has come to understand the importance of working together as a pack of human pups. Most personal life crises of single members from within impact on the whole pack, as well as the problems of the world outside the pack affect everybody. No one in the pack escapes issues that occur. So, every effort that helps the pack work together helps everyone have a better experience of pup play and cope with any dilemmas and strife.
There are definitely elements to creating and maintaining a cohesive pack in the beginning. Many are things that the Owner of the pack can do. One is having a firm idea of what a pack is, which can vary from person to person. From the start when adopting a new member an Owner can be aware of the pups need to master learning and the benefit of training a pup for them. An Owner can help the pack work better by giving positive feedback and handling conflict in a constructive way. The pack can also benefit from having an Alpha pup who watches over the pups.
All of these things and more are important, yet each and every member of the pack can take actions every day to help the pack work - to function well and in a healthy way.
Don't be jealous of new pups
Making a newcomer to the pack feel welcome is very important. We use our website to provide as much information as possible for a new pup who joins us to know what kind of pack we are and who we are as pups. But even in simply talking with a new pup, it really helps to ask them about their experiences and find common ground with each other. Being stand offish and guarded early on can really come across to a new pup as almost hurtful and insensitive, so it is very important to make an effort to reach out and chat and engage with new members of your pack. Keep in mind that people are almost always nervous so they will be guarded, so try not to take that personally. A smile, a greeting, an acknowledgement can make all the difference in helping pups build trust with one another. And the number one rule - don't feel threatened or jealous of new pups. Make an effort to overcome and deal with any such feelings in a healthy way.
Talk, chat, vid!
Keep information flowing between packmates. It really helps using social networking and modern technology to stay in touch with each other. Smartphones allow us to skype chat, google hangout, facebook chat, and group message each other. And even more - we send each other pictures and vids all the time so we are in a feeling of connectedness as a pack. Importantly, it is done with respect and care - stay aware that if a text may be misunderstood, send a vid of your own words and convey your feeling better.
Teach so that others can learn
Every pack member has skills they can share with others in the group, and we all benefit from different viewpoints on what we already know. In the caring environment of the pack it is important to remember that people learn at different rates, and sometimes in different ways. So through teaching we practice tolerance and understanding of our packmates.
Help and ask for it appropriately
Offer assistance to your packmates when they are in need, yet let them stand on their own four feet. With practice you can learn to define the line between what you need to help a packmate with, and what they really could and should handle themselves. Without intruding too much into each others personal lives, we offer help to one another in trouble and guide each other along a path to having better lives overall. This is where we talk to each other when in doubt and ask packmates - "what can I do to help my packmate?"
Ask for help if you need it, and remember that if you are confused or uncertain, a packmate has probably faced that same problem in the past. You can benefit from their learning and experience by just asking. They may also have a different perspective that helps you out a lot. Simply reframing your problem can often be a huge change for you for the better.
Speak up in the pack
You are a member and your voice should be part of the chorus of your pack. As much as you all may be talented, none of you are likely to have psychic powers so packmates are not likely to know what is going on inside your head if you don't tell them. We have training and practice on how to communicate and how to ask for things for ourselves, and most importantly on how to get what we want out of human pup play. You can avoid a lot of frustration and anger on all sides by speaking up clearly and sensibly.
Talking in terms of outcomes rather than dwelling on the problems is extremely important. By helping packmates focus on what they want to achieve rather than what hurdles they may face, having fun and working together is more likely to happen. You can look to the result and aim for it rather than look to the start and what barriers you face already. Even simply doing this for yourself, and overcoming hurdles inspires your fellow packmates to be braver and go after what they want.
Problems are best solved calmly and kindly
Give feedback supportively to your packmates helps you be liked and cared about and them feel more confident and happy to be in the pack. It is that simple.
Taking your problems to the right source is perhaps the hardest and most important thing you can do. Stress and anxiety affect us and colour our way of thinking and interacting. Without meaning to we can lash out or respond to packmates harshly, when they aren't even the real source of our stress or trauma. So, when a packmate is angry or distressed, it is all too common that the problem has nothing to do with the pack and everything to do with their job, living situation. blood sugar level..etc. When you are are angry and frustrated you aren't usually sensible and able to see that for yourself. Listening to your packmates help you see the big picture is very important. Then you can focus on acting on the right source of distress.
Last, but not least, focus on the fun and friendship. Maintain a sense of humour as often as you can pup and you will find having fun is a whole lot easier. You are with your packmates, and they are your friends of a different collar.